Monday, 3 May 2010

wanting for what you wait for

ive always said that id never post anything on the Internet that i wouldn't be able to say to the person its about, or discuss with a friend for advice.
i think ive managed to keep that pretty well, granted we all have slip ups, but creating a fictitious character using a photo, some clever words and a keyboard- and then trying to pass it off as yourself is ridiculous.
being true to myself comes first.

open the windows of your mind, 
push out the lies,
clear away the clutter,
and welcome the truth in.

so surely...a clutter free mind could eventually lead to a clutter free life? 
or at the very least one without so many unwanted complications.

recently, ive realised that although a relationship is something ive come to crave, its something that has no place in my life at the moment unless its perfect.

but does perfection exist? perfect people- no. but perfect moments- undoubtedly. 

i always said that id make room for the right guy, no matter what id find a way to work on the relationship that gave me butterflies. the guy who made me smile when i was afraid of the dark.
it turns out that isnt enough.
i need that guy, who wants exactly what i want. whos willing to wait for me to finish finding myself before planning the future.

i need to finish finding out exactly who i am, what makes me tick, what i want to fulfill my every wish before i can hand my future to someone else.

if someone was the same as me, craving that closeness, someone to cuddle, someone to hold, to share the smiles and joys with aswell as the sorrows- but still finding themselves...

I need a companion.
Whos on my journey.
Maybe not the same path.
But heading towards the same destination of self discovery...

But mostly, i need someone who needs me.
Who i need.
Someone who can accept me for who i am,
without wanting to change me.

who loves me for who i am.

life laugh love.

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